Teaching children disciplinary characteristic
With respect to many fathers and elder brothers, discipline means punishment. But in fact, discipline is the way to teach children positively with a view to helping, and assisting them in gradual self-control.
Why do children need disciplinary characteristic?
Discipline will protect children. You can teach them not to touch the ovens by saying that "The oven is too hot. You will be scalded."
Discipline helps your children in becoming sociable with everybody and developing self-control competence. The child 4 years old can remind his friends of remembering class principles in order to prevent conflicts between two children.
Discipline helps them in understanding all limits and all behaviors can be accepted. The child 6 years old should understand the concept of waiting for his turn in class because that is the proper behavior.
Therefore, discipline will help children:
- Think and act correctly.
- Understand all related logic consequences of their actions.
- Consider carefully and use the important information to succeed in schools and other places.
- Understand all life principles and show respect to others' property.
- Understand all family and community values.
Finally, the aim of discipline is to teach children behaviors like accepted ways to make lucid decisions when solving their problems.
Discipline is not a form of punishment
Discipline and punishment is not the same. The research shows that all physical punishments like beats, boxing their ears, or reviling by words are not effective. Those punishments can make you get the immediate result. However, for long-term effects, they are useless not useful. Physical punishments easily make children loss their courage and shame. From that time forward, their self-respect will decline dramatically. Even the habit of practicing violence to solve the problems will be emerged. Therefore, instead of punishing children for reasonable behaviors, you should teach them what behaviors are suitable and why they should behave like that. You should insist on what things your children are allowed to do rather than what things they are not allowed to do. For example, you should say "You have to pick up all clothes on the floor for me to clean surface by suction." rather than "Do not throw your clothes untidily on the floor again."
Fathers and elder brothers and school disciplines
Disciplines that children learn at home are the basic foundation for their behaviors at schools. School disciplines are more extended than home disciplines. Parents should also understand and support all school disciplines. If parents know that their children have bad behaviors at schools such as running out of their classes, talking in private, you should cooperate with their teachers to find out the solutions.
Some pieces of advice for teaching children disciplinary characteristic
- Set an example for children to follow. For example, if you want to teach children not to settle the conflicts or any problems by force, you should not use physical punishment for your children.
- Establish all limits. But be careful if you impose many principles on your children. Before bringing out all principles, you should ask yourselves if all principles are necessary or they can protect your children's heath and safety, if those principles can protect other's interests and properties, if there are too many principles, your children find it difficult to remember and you also feel hard to follow till the end.
- Create simple and understandable principles.
- Allow children to take part in the process of establishing the principles as much as possible. Therefore, children will lessen to smash up the principles because they also take part in the process of creating the principles.
- Help children understand all principles and know thoroughly what will happen if they break through all principles.
- Be flexible. Some of principles are suitable for little children. However, when they are grown up, they need their independence. Or each child will react differently to different principles. Hence, you should be flexible when putting all principle in practice.
- Train your children's independence.
- Speak clearly what their behaviors make you and others feel unpleasant.
- Act quickly when your children express their unexpected behaviors Do not wait until the problems escalate, do you have measures to prevent.
- Be consistent. Unify the viewpoints about education methodology with other members of your families.
- Encourage all good achievements and behaviors with a view to letting your children know that you highly appreciate your children's efforts.
- Avoid scrambling for power with your children. Discipline is not a game in which there are winners and losers. You should expect the cooperation from your children. And your children expect your justice. Sometimes, you should show your respect towards your children. Therefore, they have rights to express their divergence.
- Point out some positive suggestions. Avoid criticizing, finding their faults because they will make your children fell annoyed, furious, or decrease their self-respect.
- Encourage your children to be independent people with high attitude of responsibility.
- You should be humorous people.
- Tell your children that you love them than ever in the world. When your children behave badly, let your children know that you do not like their actions, not hate themselves.
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